Three Surprising Differences Between Everyday and Business Culture in the U.S.

If you think that everyday behaviors and business practices always match, you could be in for some serious blunders. What’s customary in daily life on the one hand and appropriate in business on the other can diverge in unexpected ways.

Read about three areas that require you to adapt when you go from everyday life to professional setting: Time and Scheduling, Small Talk, and Apologizing. (As always with cultural insights – these are not absolute truths, but observations and guidelines.)

1.     Time and Scheduling: Everyday Life vs. Business

In everyday American life, scheduling is pretty flexible. Americans often agree to meet with friends at “around” a specific time. Even when a fixed time is set, let’s say 7 pm, showing up a bit late is not a big deal. In some instances, it’s even expected to be “fashionably late”. Next time you’re invited to a dinner party, plan to arrive 10 or 15 minutes after the official start time. This will give your host enough time to finish preparations and show that you are culturally informed. If it’s more than 15 minutes, it’s best to call or text to let your host know you’re running late.

In business, punctuality is essential. Showing up late to an interview, starting a meeting behind schedule, or missing a deadline – these are all seen as unprofessional. Punctuality doesn’t just apply to start times. Americans also expect you to end on time. Overruns are considered a sign of poor organization and ineffective time management. Some people may even perceive it as disrespectful, since you’re disrupting their schedules.

The emphasis on punctuality begins at a young age in school and continues into college. Professors are often already in the classroom when students arrive, setting the expectation that class starts on time. Being late may even affect your grades through reduced participation points or similar penalties.

2.     Small Talk: Casual vs. Professional Settings

In casual settings, small talk can be lengthy and quickly move into personal topics. Newcomers may be surprised by how openly Americans discuss family and other personal issues. A favorite topic is one’s children: U.S. parents often talk extensively and proudly about their kids’ performance in school (including their grades), accomplishments in sports, and plans for college.

In professional settings, sharing is more limited. Don’t expect every meeting to start with small talk. U.S. business meetings are highly action- and solution focused. There’s usually a clear agenda and getting to the point is critical. That leaves little room for digressions and if there’s some chitchat, it’s brief. After my many years of living and working in the U.S., I'm still struck by the ease with which many Americans weave in quick personal remarks – almost like mini small talk – before seamlessly returning to the discussion topic.

In the workplace, conversation topics are light. Stay away from controversial or polarizing subjects. For networking purposes, have a few stories ready to share. Storytelling can help you connect and build trust – if done right. (I offer customized coaching and workshops on how to make your stories effective and memorable.)

3.     Apologizing: Clients vs. Colleagues

In daily life, “sorry” is used frequently. To newcomers, especially from Europe, it can seem as if Americans say sorry constantly, even when there’s nothing to apologize for. You’ll hear “sorry” when someone walks past you in the grocery store aisle without even touching you. Or at a lunch buffet, when the person next to you reaches for a plate, without even blocking your way. Or it’s used to soften a request. Of course, there are also apologies that are genuine and justified when something’s gone wrong.

In business, people tend to phrase their apologies more carefully and strategically. Especially when dealing with a client, an apology can be interpreted as admitting liability and assuming legal blame. This could harm the company financially and damage their reputation. Choosing the right words for your expression of regret is therefore crucial – and a critical skill to learn for anyone doing business in the U.S. or with Americans.

Among colleagues, you’re expected to own up to your mistakes and apologize directly and briefly. Over-apologizing is seen as a weakness. If done via email, there’s no need to apologize repeatedly. Once is enough. Face-to-face, keep it short and specific. After the actual apology, it’s important to add a forward-looking and solution-oriented statement, such as “I’ll take care if it right away.”

Many people think they understand U.S. culture based on the movies and TV-shows they stream or a vacation trip they took. They don’t realize that the reality of doing business here has many unexpected and hidden aspects – things that can quickly lead to miscommunication and failure. Contact me, if you want to avoid the pitfalls and do things the right way from day one. I can help.

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