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Networking: Joining Group Conversations with Confidence

“How can I break into a group conversation at a networking event? It’s so awkward!” A colleague asked me this a few days ago, and I’m sure many of you can relate. If the idea of striking up a conversation with strangers feels scary to you, you are not alone. In this blog, I’ll share practical strategies to help you handle these situations with confidence.


Football players in a huddle

If you are looking to work or do business in the US, there is a key skill you’ll need to master: networking conversations. But let’s be honest – it’s not easy. I’ve been there: feeling uncomfortable at events, hesitant to approach others, worrying about saying the wrong things and making mistakes. Over time, I’ve learned a few techniques that help me feel more comfortable and confident – and today I’m passing them on to you.  


Scenario 1: You Recognize Someone in a Group

 

If you spot someone you know, even if it’s just a brief acquaintance, make them your focus. Walk over and try to catch their eye as you do so. If they don’t notice you, you can still go ahead and approach them. A simple greeting or “Hey, can I join you?” or “Mind if I join?” is a good way to ask.

 

If your acquaintance is speaking, it’s polite to wait until they finish—interrupting could come across as rude. Most likely, they'll signal for you to join by subtly stepping aside and opening the group to you.


Scenario 2: You Don’t Know Anyone

 

What if you don’t know anyone at all? In that case it’s important to read the room: observe the groups around you and quickly assess their body language.

 

5 people at a business event, chatting with each other.
  • Is there a physical gap in a group? Look for a larger space between two group members. That could be your spot!

  • What’s the group’s body language like? Are they standing open and upright, or are they huddled closely together? Aim for a group with open body language.

  • What’s their conversation like? Are they talking quietly and reserved or is there lots of energy: laughing, gestures, louder voices? Go for the higher-energy group. The quiet ones may be involved in a private or serious conversation and therefore not be open to new members.

  • Are they eating and drinking? If everyone in the group has a drink or plate in hand, grab something yourself before joining. It can feel awkward for both, you and them, if you’re the only one without food or a drink.

  • Is someone in the group less engaged? Look for someone who seems a bit bored, distracted, even slightly turned away from the group. They may be a good chance for an easy entry into the group.


Needless to say, your observations should be quick. You don’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable by staring at them.

 

Once you have chosen a group, muster the courage to walk over and ask to join. Don’t just hover nearby or stand silently – that can feel awkward.


Scenario 3: You Made It in – Now What?

 

Group conversations can be competitive and fast-paced, especially for non-native speakers who might need more time to gather their thoughts and formulate their sentences. Don’t stress about jumping in right away.


Use these 9 strategies to ease in and become a contributor.

 

1.     Join the Conversation as a Listener

Listen actively: nod, smile, lean in slightly, and keep your eyes on the speaker. You can also use vocal cues, such as “ah” or short words such as “true”, to acknowledge the speaker’s words. Active listening makes you a part of the conversation, even when you’re not speaking.

 

2.     Pay Attention to Timing

In group conversations, it can be tricky to find your moment to speak. Wait too long, and you’ll miss your chance. Interrupt, and it could come across as rude, especially in the US. Pay close attention to the flow and listen for when someone is about to finish their point.

 

3.     Signal your Intention to Speak

Use a subtle gesture, like a slight hand raise, to signal that you are ready to speak. Take a quick breath in through your mouth. This helps people register that you’re about to say something. There is a good chance that their eyes will shift toward you. Now it’s your turn!

 

4.     Introduce Yourself with a Simple Statement

If you’re joining a group for the first time, a brief self-introduction before contributing can be helpful. In the US, it’s common to use your first name only. Don’t add academic degrees or complicated job titles. People will ask if they want to know more.

 

5.     Echo and Transition

Two helpful ways to start off are echoing and using transitions. Echoing means you repeat, in different words, an aspect of what someone said and then build your comment on that: “I like what you said about (topic) … Transitions have a similar function. They help you smoothly link your comment to a prior comment: “Just to add to that …”

 

6.     Stay on Topic

Don’t join a group and switch topics right away. If you have nothing to add to the topic of the conversation, you can join the conversation by asking a thoughtful question.

 

7.     Be Assertive

Being assertive means being confident, open, and direct, yet showing respect for your conversation partner’s feelings. It involves open body language, such as straight posture, and eye contact. It is also about speaking loudly enough to be heard and clearly enough to be understood.

 

8.     Get to the Point

Don’t make your conversation partners suffer by taking forever to get to the point. Remember, it’s a group conversation, not a monologue. US networking conversations are like tennis games - back and forth.

 

9.     Avoid Negativity

Keep your verbal contributions positive and don’t openly criticize people or comments. Acknowledge the opinion of others, even if you don’t agree with them.


What You Can Do Before an Event


Two birds. It seems like they are communicating with each other.

Respect Culture 

Know that not all topics travel well across cultural and professional borders. Do your research or find a cultural mentor or coach who can help you develop appropriate talking points and suitable personal and professional stories.

 

Enhance Your Spontaneous Speaking

Networking conversations require you to think on your feet. A coach can help you enhance your reaction time by putting you into simulated situations and giving you open feedback and targeted guidance.

 

Polish Your Pronunciation

Mispronounced words and strong accents are major distractions in a conversation. They can even lead to misunderstanding. If people have a hard time understanding you, they will quickly find an excuse to move on and talk to someone else. A pronunciation or accent coach can help you refine your accent while keeping your authenticity.


I help international professionals communicate more confidently and effectively in American English, whether it's in business meetings, in team collaborations, or at networking events. Reach out if you need help.


All rights reserved. Copyright © 2024 TransAtlantic Coaching & Training, LLC.

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